Gaze. Gaze upon the face of horror. Those faces belong to the Singamajig, the newest resident in the world of toys that will rise up and kill you while you're sleeping. And they'll be belting out tunes while they do it.
My daughter received one of these for her birthday, and words cannot describe the horror I felt upon messing with it for a minute or two. She happened to get the yellow one, which has easy to remove clothing for some reason, and the eeriest red eyes I've ever seen on a toy.
When you push the stomach, the horrid little beast emits a sound that may or may not sound like singing. It's hard to tell, because it's raspy little voice is reminiscent of a chain-smoking toddler. You push its hand, and it emits a different range of gibberish noises, which are probably some words spoken in demonic tongue. The possessed red eyes attest to that. Another push of the hand causes it to sing "Home on the Range." Well, kind of. It'll belt out one syllable every time you push the stomach, making the whole thing sound disjointed and eerie, as if it were sung by an old school animatronic pizza place animal.
Did I mention the thing this thing has teeth? No? well it does. an upper set and a lower set, both made of either hard plastic or possibly fiendish cartilage. When you push its stomach to hear it belt out another curse to its lord and master Baphomet, its mouth opens into an O shape, and you see its two little sets of teeth. This is entirely uncalled for, and only helps ramp up my belief that these things are out to kill your children.
So beware, parents. If one of these enters your home, immediately throw it in the garbage disposal while simultaneously pouring holy water down the drain. This will only serve to anger it, but you may be able to trap it in the disposal long enough to get to the occult bookstore and find a way to properly kill it. Otherwise, you, your family, and the world are in peril. And if you get home, and hear that sound of a raspy toddler singing public domain songs, for the love of god keep your back to the wall and don't walk near any place it can hide under.
You have been warned.
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